I’m often referred to as the silent one , the person who talks less but over thinks life. I’ve been rattling my brain to wonder why they say silent river runs deep.. what is the true meaning ..
I’m I honestly the over thinker, so deep and concentrated in the process in everybody’s life, I forget about myself. The women who drowns herself in reels, and reels of tasks, never being vocal about what I want in fear I will disappoint , always trying help and support everyone without casting judgement, trying to be a friend, a mother , girlfriend, a daughter and so forth. I have so much self guilt, I feel like I’ve failed to deliver on so many levels , I feel trapped and suffocated, I’m my own worst critic often questioning my worth and questioning my ability to deliver.
As each task unfolded I’ve realised , I can no longer be soundless and tranquil. I needed to become the speaker , the women that amplified her voice and the narrator for others who may feel lost and drowning feeling like they have to take on the world, when actually that is so far from the truth.
I’ve always envisioned, the hard faced person , that took no shit, the women that elevated not only herself but her family and friends a women who stands her ground and a women who is not just simply existing but a women that is living, her life, dreams and has her own destiny.
I’ve come to realise that pleasing everyone is something I cannot achieve. Why, because I’m only one person, and it’s honestly that simple.
Navigating our way though adulthood has never more mind boggling, the daily grind has never more complicated, and mentally & physically draining. I’ve decided my life my rules, that’s my law, that’s my inner voice finally raising to full capacity and, thats what I live by these day.
